Updated: Nov 10
Between March 1 and the beginning of April, minor things occurred throughout the weeks that I will talk about at another time. But these minor incidents that occurred as well as no longer being around my husband’s side of the family triggered him to express himself again, but this time in writing. And not writing in text messages. Writing for a school assignment. For one of his classes, he had to write a slam poem right before the Easter/Spring Vacation. With everything going on and the school knowing what had been going on, we received an email from the principal who received this information from my stepson’s teacher. They all had great concern about the topic he wrote about.
The principal left everyone voicemails as well as sending the email so everyone could see the assignment that my stepson wrote. He wanted us to read it and we didn’t blame him because everyone on our side of the family couldn’t believe what was written. It was very dark and very deep of a poem. The principal at his school even recommended that we call my stepson’s therapist and call 211 if anything else came up while he was at home. The principal also recommended us to take him to the hospital and/or call 911 if he presented himself to be suicidal.
The one thing that made me think for a bit was right in the beginning of the poem that stated:
“This poem is nothing special—just a
Have you ever looked back on something
and wished you had not done or said
Has someone ever told you “It is for the
best”, but you look back on it years later
and realize it wasn't for the best. Trauma
can happen without us even knowing it,”
It was a two-page poem and a two-page poem of it sounding like he was confessing to all the colluding. He didn’t just mention it was a warning not a poem, but when he mentioned “has someone ever told ‘it’s for the best’”, I froze right then and there. His mom is the only one who has constantly said that and would do anything for him out of “his best interest”.
The problem was though everyone was concerned, but it didn’t seem like my husband’s ex was. Yes, she forwarded it over to the CHR therapist but only said along the lines of “to talk about”. Nothing else. Nothing to say she was concerned either. Just to have something to talk about.
So even though the school was concerned and everyone else on my husband’s side of the family was concerned, my husband’s ex claimed that we just all interrupted it wrong. She claimed that it was just a poem and that there was nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about? There is always something to worry about if a child is writing in the way that my stepson did for this class assignment. Or even an adult writing or talking the way he did.
Unfortunately, she was always one to say there was nothing to worry about and that everything was perfectly fine. But my thought it…I’m not sure how everything can be perfect while he is in her care if he is still this way and by now will start to alienate everyone. A few days after this poem, we see Ben for the last time on Easter.