On June 13, 2023, my husband made the effort to send an email to his ex and the GAL to set up a time for him and his son to get together for Father’s Day. He suggested just lunch and a place of his son’s choosing. The question was, “can this be facilitated?”
The answer was what we thought it would be…NO. But we still wanted to have it on the record that my husband was still reaching out and not giving up on his son and seeing him. Especially when we were all innocent of the crimes that they fabricated against him and others. He was never going to give up on his son even if his son said once more, “if you truly love me, you’ll let me just be with mom.”
So, on June 13, we were really surprised to get a response back from anyone, but ex reached out stating, “I reminded ‘our son’ that this weekend is Father's day, and I asked him about having lunch with you Saturday or Sunday at a place of his choosing. He said no, even after I suggested having lunch with you more than once.”
After that was said, we were also surprised that also the same day the GAL responded back with saying, “It would be very nice if ‘your son’ would join his dad on Father’s Day for either lunch or even an ice cream. Is it possible that the 3 of you could meet and do this together to make it happen?”
By the end of the day, we heard one last time from my husband’s ex stating, “I just now asked ‘our son’ if he would have lunch with dad and myself, or ice cream with dad and myself, and he said no to both.”
We knew she was going to keep saying this and at the same time, we didn’t even know if she really did ask him or not. We were happy to see for once the GAL agreeing that they should get together, but that would soon change because of a conversation my stepson had with a friend from our church.
Unfortunately, the next night as I was heading to bed, I started to receive text messages from a boy from our church. Being almost midnight, I was very concerned as to why he was reaching out to me so late, but he was sending me a conversation in real time. Why? Because he was so concerned as to what was going on. At first, he meant to send it to our Pastor, but felt it was necessary to send to ourselves because my stepson was admitting he was using suicidal as a tool, but it wasn’t just that. He was also saying that they (meaning him and his mom) had the upper hand in all this. Why? Because they deleted important information that would have showed the colluding and all the falsified accusations? Why? Because they have the upper hand with getting away with their crimes since they practically bankrupted us, and we can’t do much more legally at this time. All in all, the language that was being used was unbelievable. I can say that I am so proud of his friend for standing up for what was true, standing up to a bully like my stepson, and not letting my stepson get to him.
We realized a while ago that if you didn’t follow the narrative of his dad being the worst most abusive parent ever, then you were blocked and no longer part of his life. So first, my stepson no longer talked to the kids that were a part of the falsified child abuse incident, and now because of this conversation, that was soon going to happen next.
The end of the conversation was truly sad. His friend from church spoke the truth because he went through similar situations when he was my stepson’s age. He even said along the lines to my stepson, “just wait until our Pastor talks to you.” My stepson then came back saying, “he won’t. Have a bad life. Bye.” After that, his once friend from church asked him, “so your gonna block me cuz everyones trying to help u?” And sure enough, my stepson said, “Yup thx”. So it wasn’t that he was eliminating people from his life, but people not just affiliated with his dad, but those who were truly trying to help him.
This conversation was also right before his next CHR appointment. So, because all these text messages were shown to the GAL and his therapist before his appointment, guess what happened next? Safety Plan #2.
Safety Plan #2 trigger was plain and simple: Thinking about Dad/Communicating with him.
By this point in time, my husband wasn’t seeing his son and though he tried to reach out here and there, he never received a response from his son either. It also didn’t help that they still allowed him to have both phones. His dad’s and the secret one, so he was using the secret one, always.
But with Safety Plan #2 now, we knew what was going to happen. My stepson was going to be able to get out of seeing his father on Father’s Day. And sure enough, at 7:30PM, we received an email from his GAL stating along the lines of due to this safety plan being put into place and triggers being communicating or thinking about dad, she decided to not recommend access on Father’s Day. So really, whenever there was a chance for him to see his son, something came up minor, or something came up like this safety plan. We can say that for once, the GAL did say it was disappointing but at this time we must take the safety plan and his mental health into account. She also mentioned that she would work with CHR to find ways to commence therapy with my stepson and husband and to also ensure that my stepson is getting the evaluations and treatment he needs. I can say this was back in June, and it wasn’t up until this past week in November, that something seems to be getting done…possibly. We are still very hesitant about the outcome.
It's truly sad in this case that my stepson was using suicide and harming himself as a tool. This is just as scary. We pray for him daily to get the help he needs and the PROPER help he needs. But this also truly devastated for my husband as well. Because of all the colluding, it came to the point that my husband and anything about him was still a trigger. And…my husband never did anything wrong but love his child.
Imagine it feeling like your child was kidnapped and no one seems to care? That is how my husband felt and still feels today. Especially since the courts don’t care what we were put through, and my stepson’s GAL doesn’t care about our evidence either. They ALL just claim he is safer at his mom’s house.